What Is EMDR Therapy? A Gentle Approach to Healing Trauma

Monique Mercier
Oct 28
7 min read

Trauma can leave deep emotional imprints that affect how we think, feel, and react long after the event has passed. You might notice flashbacks, anxiety, or self-blame even years later, and wonder why it’s so hard to “move on.” Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR) therapy offers a gentle, structured way to help your mind and body process these difficult experiences, so they no longer hold the same power over you.

At Kindful Psychology Services, our clinicians use EMDR as part of a compassionate, trauma-informed approach to therapy. Whether you’re struggling with the effects of past trauma, chronic stress, grief, or anxiety, EMDR can support meaningful healing without needing to relive painful memories in detail.

Understanding EMDR Therapy

EMDR (Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing) was developed in the late 1980s by psychologist Dr. Francine Shapiro. She discovered that rhythmic eye movements, similar to what happens during REM sleep, could help reduce the emotional intensity of distressing thoughts. Currently the research supports that it is not only the bilateral stimulation (e.g., eye movements, tapping, etc.) that facilitate processing but also the dual attention aspect. This means that the client is aware that they are both here in the room with the therapist at the same time as revisiting old emotions from distressing memories. By doing so, it helps the brain to process and metabolize these feelings and convert them into long-term memory where they are less intrusive and bothersome.

Over time, EMDR evolved into an eight-phase, evidence-based treatment recognized by organizations such as the World Health Organization (WHO), the American Psychiatric Association, and the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs as an effective therapy for trauma and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD).

Unlike traditional talk therapy, EMDR doesn’t require you to discuss every detail of your trauma to heal. Instead, it focuses on helping your brain reprocess how those memories are stored, so they no longer trigger the same physical or emotional reactions.

How EMDR Works

When we experience trauma, our brains can struggle to process it properly. The event’s sights, sounds, and feelings can become “stuck” in the nervous system, leaving us reliving it in flashbacks, nightmares, or sudden emotional reactions.

EMDR helps the brain reprocess these experiences through dual attention which is facilitated by bilateral stimulation, which might involve eye movements, gentle tapping, or alternating sounds. This back-and-forth rhythm seems to activate the brain’s natural healing system, helping traumatic memories shift from “raw and reactive” to “resolved and integrated.”

The process allows your mind to connect past experiences with present understanding, reducing distress while restoring a sense of calm and control.

The Eight Phases of EMDR Therapy

Although every session is tailored to the individual, EMDR follows eight key phases:

1. History and Treatment Planning

Your therapist gathers background information and helps identify the target memories or situations you’d like to address. This stage builds understanding and trust, crucial foundations for trauma work.

2. Preparation

You’ll learn grounding and self-soothing techniques to help you stay calm and present during processing. These might include mindfulness exercises or guided visualizations.

3. Assessment

Together, you’ll identify specific aspects of a memory —images, thoughts, emotions, and body sensations — to focus on during EMDR sessions.

4. Desensitization

This is where bilateral stimulation begins. You’ll recall aspects of the memory as you follow your therapist’s cues (eye movements, sounds, or taps). Over time, distress usually decreases naturally.

5. Installation

Your therapist helps you strengthen positive beliefs about yourself, like “I am safe now” or “I did my best.” This reinforces resilience and new patterns of thought.

6. Body Scan

You’ll check for lingering physical tension or discomfort. EMDR aims to have your body feel as calm as your thoughts about the memory.

7. Closure

Each session ends by helping you feel stable and grounded before you leave. You’ll also learn techniques to manage emotions between sessions.

8. Re-evaluation

At the next session, your therapist checks how you’re feeling about the memory and whether additional processing is needed.

This structured approach ensures you always move at a pace that feels safe and manageable.

What EMDR Feels Like

People often describe EMDR as emotionally intense but relieving. You remain awake and in control throughout. Rather than re-living the trauma, you observe it with guidance, allowing your brain to “digest” the experience naturally.

Some clients notice strong emotional waves during sessions; others experience subtle shifts in how they think or feel afterward. Many report that distressing memories begin to feel more distant or less charged, like watching an old film rather than being inside it.

It’s normal to feel tired or reflective afterward. Because EMDR activates both the emotional and cognitive parts of the brain, processing continues between sessions, as your brain consolidates memories during sleep.

Who Can Benefit from EMDR Therapy?

While EMDR is best known for treating trauma and PTSD, research and clinical experience show that it can also help with a range of other issues, including:

Anxiety and panic attacks
Depression and grief
Phobias
Chronic pain or somatic symptoms
Low self-esteem and self-criticism
Stress and burnout
Performance anxiety (in work, sports, or creative fields)

At Kindful Psychology, EMDR is often integrated with other evidence-based therapies, such as Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT), Mindfulness-Based Therapy, or Self-Compassion Therapy, depending on your goals and comfort level.

This flexible, person-centered approach means we meet you where you are, gently combining techniques that suit your individual pace and needs.

The Science Behind EMDR

Decades of research support EMDR’s effectiveness. According to a 2018 review in the Frontiers in Psychology journal, EMDR produces significant and lasting improvements in trauma symptoms, often in fewer sessions than traditional talk therapy.

Neuroimaging studies show that EMDR helps regulate activity in the amygdala (the brain’s fear center) and strengthens communication between brain regions involved in emotional regulation and memory integration.

In simpler terms, EMDR helps your brain “file away” distressing experiences instead of reliving them.

For those who’ve tried other therapies without feeling lasting relief, EMDR can provide a fresh pathway to healing, one that engages both body and mind.

EMDR Summary

While both EMDR and talk therapy aim to improve emotional well-being, they differ in focus and structure.

Aspect	EMDR Therapy	Traditional Talk Therapy (e.g., CBT)
Approach	Focuses on reprocessing distressing memories through dual attention and bilateral stimulation	Focuses on analyzing and reframing thoughts
Verbal discussion	Minimal, does not require detailed retelling	Extensive, relies heavily on verbal and emotional exploration
Primary goal	Reduce distress and integrate memories to improve mood and functioning	Change thinking patterns and behaviors to improve mood and functioning.
Use of the body	Incorporates physical sensations and bilateral movement	Focuses mainly on cognition and behavioural changes to facilitate improvement

At Kindful Psychology, we see EMDR as a complement to, rather than a replacement for, talk therapy. Many clients benefit from combining both, using EMDR to resolve emotional blocks and CBT or mindfulness-based approaches to build healthy coping skills.

What to Expect in an EMDR Session at Kindful Psychology

Your first EMDR session won’t jump straight into reprocessing. Instead, your therapist will:

Take time to understand your history and current challenges.
Explain how EMDR works in simple, clear language.
Teach yourself-regulation tools for managing emotions.
Build trust so you feel safe and supported before any deeper work begins.

When you’re ready, EMDR sessions typically last 60-90 minutes. The pace always matches your comfort and readiness. Your therapist will guide the process gently and check in often to ensure you feel stable.

Between sessions, many clients notice positive shifts in how they respond to everyday stressors. With continued sessions, the emotional charge around traumatic memories often fades, replaced by a growing sense of calm, confidence, and clarity.

EMDR and Self-Compassion

At Kindful Psychology, our clinicians believe that healing isn’t just about resolving past pain; it’s about cultivating a new relationship of kindness toward yourself and your pain.

We often integrate EMDR with Mindful Self-Compassion practices, helping clients meet their emotions with gentleness rather than judgment. This blend is particularly effective for individuals who’ve internalized shame, guilt, or self-criticism after trauma.

By combining EMDR’s reprocessing power with mindfulness and compassion-based techniques, we help clients reconnect with their inner safety and self-worth, creating not only symptom relief but deep emotional growth.

EMDR for Healthcare Professionals and Teachers

If you’re a healthcare professional, teacher, or first responder, you may face repeated exposure to stressful or distressing situations. Over time, these can accumulate into secondary trauma or burnout.

EMDR can help you process these experiences before they develop into chronic stress or compassion fatigue. By working through emotional triggers, you can regain a sense of balance and continue supporting others without losing yourself in the process.

Our team at Kindful Psychology offers EMDR sessions both in-person and online across Ontario, making it accessible even for those with demanding schedules or living in remote areas.

EMDR and Couples Therapy

While EMDR primarily focuses on individual healing, unresolved trauma in one or both partners can profoundly affect relationships. Emotional triggers may surface as defensiveness, withdrawal, or miscommunication.

At Kindful Psychology, EMDR can complement your couples therapy treatment, including Emotionally Focused Couples Therapy (EFCT) or the Gottman Method. Processing individual trauma often strengthens a couple’s ability to empathize, communicate, and rebuild trust.

Is EMDR Right for You?

EMDR may be a good fit if you:

Have experienced trauma or distressing events that still affect your daily life (e.g., flashbacks, intrusive thoughts/images, repetitive and ruminative thoughts)
Struggle with anxiety, depression, or intrusive thoughts
Feel “stuck” despite previous therapy or self-help efforts
Experience physical symptoms (like tension or pain) linked to emotional distress
Are open to a structured, mind-body approach to healing

During your initial consultation at Kindful Psychology, your therapist will discuss whether EMDR is a good fit for you and what alternatives might be helpful.

Therapists Trained in EMDR

At Kindful Psychology, several of our therapists are trained in EMDR, including: